The uproar hasn’t stopped since it was announced that Chaz Bono will be one of the cast on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars, which premieres on September 19.
While there are many people who are supportive of Chaz and his appearance, plenty more crawled out from under their rocks to be shocked, appalled, and offended in the comments section of the DWTS website.
Of course, there are the usual yawners harping about chromosomes and destiny, but in addition, a whole new group has materialized – parents who aren’t going to watch the show because they don’t know how to explain a man dancing with a woman to their children.
The Dancing with the Stars website is littered with these concerned comments – How am I going to explain this to my five-year-old? What will I tell the children? We’re not going to be watching this season, because I don’t want my children to see this!
I understand. It is concerning when children are exposed to heterosexual dancing. At best, a man dancing with a woman seems just a tad bit edgy – and worst-case scenario, it’s just plain immoral. After all, you know what dancing leads to! I believe they covered that a long time ago in the movie Footloose (when today’s concerned parents were kids).
So I want to offer the following tips to those parents who are worried that their children will lose their innocence by watching this season’s DWTS:
> Before the show starts, sit down and explain to the kiddies that sometimes boys and girls see each other across a crowded gymnasium at prom, and while the senior high band plays their special rendition of “Back to Black,” they are all simply compelled to get up and dance – with each other! Tell the kids that someday they will understand – the dancing and the words to “Back to Black.”
> Pick out an innocent song from your own youth – say, “She Bop” by Cyndi Lauper or “Little Red Corvette” by Prince – and start dancing with each other. There’s no better way to break the kids in than to have them witness their own mother and father spinning around the living room together. When you’re finished, explain to them that when grown-ups fall in love, it’s natural for them to want to dance together. Someday, unless they grow up to be perverts, they, too, will be dancing with members of the opposite sex.
> Go on YouTube and find old clips from American Bandstand. Show them that heterosexual dancing on television is nothing new. The only difference is that it’s now available in full color on the big screen. If they’re grossed out and scared, assure them that Dick Clark will not be hosting Dancing with the Stars.
> Find the video of President and Mrs. Obama dancing together at his inauguration. When they can see that even the president and his wife dance together, in public, and on television, they will come to realize that this is perfectly normal and natural and nothing to be concerned about. It really is a beautiful thing.
Once you have done all these things, turn on Dancing with the Stars. If they start to wiggle or become uncomfortable when the various couples come out and dance, remind them of everything you have shown them.
Hold each other’s hand and sway gently to the music so they can be comforted by the image of the two of you enjoying the show. As each couple takes the stage, say, “See? It’s okay.” Soon your children will realize that there is nothing disgusting, sinful, or immoral about a man and a woman dancing together.
And that’s how you explain it to the children.
Beautiful.
Grace
I don’t know… if I let my child watch this, he might get the impression that it’s okay to dance with someone of a different gender.
Wow! I now have a reason to watch DWTS. Not that I really need one, but getting to watch a man dance with a woman should really make the ratings soar.
Yeah that’s all fine and good, but will I be able to dance after watching the show?
Hasn’t there been a Playboy Playmate (Kendra Wilkinson) on DWTS? So how do parents explain HER to their children? I have no moral qualms with Kendra, but it’s interesting that the complainers don’t seems to have a problem with that.
I haven’t watched DWTS since season 1…but will definitely watch to support Chaz. I hope he’s on long enough to get healthier.
GO CHAZ!!!!
I love this post!!
Please add it as a link to the DWTS website!!
That’s a good idea, Nathan. I love it, Matt, but you’re preaching to the choir here. My wish is that the people who really need to see this will see it.
This is disgusting. Hitler, Stalin and most pedophiles have been heterosexuals. Most of the child abuse, rape and murder is committed by heterosexuals. And now we’re expected to watch these ‘heteros’ dance with one another and touch each other on tv? Besides, what has this Chaz person ever really accomplished—it’s not like he’s got Bristol Palin’s incredible talents.
I really do wish the major television stations would be considerate of my family – when I turn on my TV I don’t exactly want to be bombarded with disgusting images of heterosexual couples… dancing! (Have you ever wondered how they “do” it? I mean, one has longer legs and the other is wearing a dress… how do they keep up!?)
We love you Matt Kailey.
Haha.
That was such a delight to read, thank you. =)
I love you, and I want to have your babies!
Brilliant post!
Brilliant, and shared; thanks Matt! =D
God a man and woman dancing!! What would the rabbi say? (See Fiddler on the Roof). For me in all seriousness, why is Chaz; Sonny and Cher’s transgendered child, why not just their son?
Dear Concerned Parent,
Your young child has no idea who Sonny & Cher were, let alone Chaz.
If your son under age 25 (let alone under 18) already knows who Cher is, you’re too late. He’s gay. Better luck next time!
Thanks for all your kind words and your really funny and insightful comments. You are all fantastic!
this is amazing! thank you so, so much for posting. but CaptLex is correct in saying that folks outside the trans and queer communities should be assured that neither they nor their children will be scarred or offended by seeing chaz (or anyone else for that matter) dance on public television. i read this aloud to my parents and siblings and they found it amusing (and agreed w/ you).
Matt, on the nose as usual! I sent this out via tweetie (didn’t actually know we COULD do that) so I’m hoping it will be shared and shared some more.
Julie
Ha! Ha! Oh sarcasm, how you save my sanity! Such a great post! Worthy of the Onion (a high complement from me)!
On a serious note, though, this is much more useful, positive and original than my initial and less than articulate, “WTF is wrong with people!??!”
Something else–This was discussed on GMA yesterday and I was so proud to see the anchors fail to maintain a neutral position when Sam Champion (who is feaking adorable anyway) said, “I don’t want to believe that we are a hateful country.”
Anyway, thanks so much for a great post!
It’s sad that people have so little faith in their children.
Thanks again for reading and for all your comments. I can’t believe this non-controversy is still raging on, with people refusing to watch the show!
Someone asked me about “Back to Black.” I have no idea what young people are listening to nowadays (I always feel ancient when I say stuff like that), so I just picked a song from the last decade that I knew and liked and that was edgy and not innocent. It’s Amy Winehouse’s song and one of my favorites. I doubt that anyone’s really playing it at prom now. Ten years from now, it will probably be elevator music.
I’m really looking forward to seeing Chaz on DWTS. I’ve never watched it before, so for every viewer they lose, I think they’ll gain five.
looks like a man acts like a man is he dancing with a man no problem
looks like a man acts like a man is he dancing with a woman no problem
Actually, I have a slightly different viewpoint. The education of our children actually starts before they are born. Sharing our love and appreciation of and with our partners in full view of our children, holding hands, kissing, saying sweet tender nothings, and yes dancing together teaches our children by positive example, no words necessary. Of course I also believe that it is impossible to spoil a child with hugs, kisses, tickles, cuddles, reading to them, letting them know that they are so very special, loved for who they are, appreciated. Watching programs such as dancing w/the stars thus is made an instant yawner.
I’m impressed with your snarkiness. Well done.
Hey, what woould happen if DWTS had a gay or lesbian couple on the show??? As far as Chaz goes, those kids who watch the show will just see another man and woman dancing. Hey, if the kids are too young and impressionable, why aren;’t they IN BED by the time the show comes on anyway??
Ah ha ha! Too funny. And agreed… no one that young knows who Chaz is… So… Just leave it? *sigh*
And yes
. This would be great in the Onion.
You won’t condemn Chaz for having his views but you will condemn those who don’t agree. Apparently some opinions just don’t matter to YOU either.
Freaking breeders…now they’re dancing?!?! What’s the world coming to??
Oh and to the hateful crawling out from under your rock people…..I’m sure there’s room on that woman’s back porch where you too can see Russia. Good luck deciphering what she’s (the woman who won’t be named) saying.
Of course, there are people in this country who consider dancing in general, and with the opposite sex, immoral (ever seen 19 Kids and Counting?) IME they tend not to watch much TV anyway, so DWTS isn’t likely to be an issue for them.