You could discuss with your children your own parents choosing of your name and gender identity and what its meant for you that they chose an identity for you that (I assume) happened to be a comfortable enough fit for you as well. Talk with them about how you continue to participate in a (i’m assuming) Western culture that pretty much makes assigning and enforcing binary gender identities mandatory for all parents and what that means to you as cisgender people. Talking about these things from this perspective might give you a better handle about the reality of your own cisgender privilege and how the coerced binary gender system works for you and how it harm trans people.

And also I would discuss with them their feelings/impressions about the trans people you all know personally. And if you do not know of any trans people personally, I would talk about why that might be.

I personally have yet to meet any cis parents who have been willing to discuss trans people and anti-trans discrimination as anything but an “othered” reality for “those poor trans people” out there who they hope their kids will be tolerant enough to be nice to when they grow up etc…. even the cis parents i know with the very best intentions. I am hoping they are out there tho. And that you’re among them.

Of course I have no idea what kind of impression you make when you do interview for a position.Do you dress appropriately? If you wear make-up is is correctly applied? Does your appearance make those you meet uncomfortable? Things are changing, but if you don’t make a good first impression, you will never get an opportunity to make a second one.

Just a thought.

I live in a small town, and online trans communities have saved me many times. Laura’s Playground forums (and the larger site, of course) are excellent, and they have a strong MTF/trans woman population (and a strong FTM community, hooray), with many people in all stages of transition and with all levels of community acceptance. They are found here: (http://www.lauras-playground.com/forums/index.php?act=idx).

You are in my thoughts.

I’m now in my fourth year of therapy and would not do without her (though I may have to, at some stage, replacing her maybe by someone else like a partner).

Matt’s advice to move is also good, though it may be practically quite difficult, especially if you have no job at the moment. I wonder if you can update your medical skills by even volunteering or doing an internship, at least to fill that CV a little. There must be trans discussion fora out there in cyberworld to whom you can talk.

We were kept away from diversity in people by just being with others of our own kind, period. When I was a kid there were no opportunities to learn about other people who were different from us.

Nowadays, that is all changed and we really do need to teach kids how to live in a very diverse world and how to treat ALL people with respect and dignity. Great post, Matt in your answers to the reader who posted the question in the first place. Right On!