A reader writes: “First off, let me say I despise violence, drama, etc. My nerves can’t handle it, and being bipolar, it’s a huge trigger for depression, etc. Sadly, however, bigots even within our family are a reality.
“I have been on HRT (hormone replacement therapy) since 2001. And have had bilateral orchiectomy (testicle removal). If I could afford SRS, I would have it years ago. SSI (Supplemental Security Income) is all I get, however, and that ain’t a whole lot.
“So now my question: There have been times, and last week, where so-called bio women threaten me or even assault me. Then when I stand up for myself, there is almost always a man who steps in and says, ‘No, you’re a dude. You’re not going to touch a woman.’
“Are they right? Or do I have the right to assert that ‘Hey, I am too a woman and can defend myself against another woman like any other woman?’”
I’m sorry that you have had to deal with this. Assault is a hugely emotional and triggering topic, so I am going to preface this reply with a very big “in my opinion.” So here goes:
IN MY OPINION, a person who is being assaulted has the right to defend him- or herself, regardless of that person’s gender or the gender of the assailant.
That said, the way I see it is that there are two goals when a person is being assaulted: to stay alive and to escape the situation with as little bodily harm as possible. Given those two goals, the first and best response to a threat or an attack is to leave the situation, if that is possible.
If the assault is a threat, a shove, or even a punch in the mouth, if you can get away, you need to do so. Walk, run, whatever you need to do to leave the situation. Staying in the situation, or responding verbally or physically, can escalate it, leading to further assault and more danger. (more…)