A reader writes: “I was looking back on an old post where you stated trans guys all ‘pass’ after x amount of time on testosterone.
“I have now been on T seven years. I have changed my documentation. I have a baritone voice. I still occasionally get read as female. This seems to occur more when I am in queer-friendly spaces, and if it happens where I can respond, I simply correct people and say, ‘It’s sir, actually’ or something similar.
“I think it’s important that trans men realize that sometimes you can do things ‘right’ (have a deep voice, act masculine, etc.) and your transition might still take a long, long time.”
It’s true. I have said in the past that, in general, trans guys will not be mistaken for female within a year or two of starting testosterone. And I think this is true for most trans guys – but there will always be exceptions. Transition is a process, not a product, and hormones are going to affect everyone differently.
Some people’s bodies just don’t process hormones in a “typical” or expected way. For some, the genetics just aren’t there for the physical changes that allow for complete assimilation as a “traditional” male (or female).
For me, I have had to accept the fact that I will be “ma’amed” at least 50 percent of the time on the telephone and at drive-thrus. I hate it, but I don’t think that it will ever change. I don’t have a super-deep voice, but it’s not the deepness that is the problem – it’s the inflection or modulation. My voice is all over the place – up, down, and very expressive.
That is a “female” trait in our culture. I’ve tried the monotone thing, but I have to concentrate too hard, and if I’m not thinking about it, I revert right back. So that’s my annoyance, but it is minor. (more…)